RD : I took the day off work so I could renew my drivers license. I was surprised that it gone done so early and ended up having to kill 3 1/2 hours at newport center. I make the bad dining decision of the day as I order arthur treacher’s fish and chips for the first time in 20 years. I should have just asked them to pour the oil out of the fryer directly into my blood stream.

PP: YIKES. I remember when the Arthur Treacher’s hush puppies were my favorite food back in the dark days of the 1970s when they had a franchise a block away on 72nd Street. I’ve since grown up and once again stick to the tried and true chicken and rice from Le Bistro.

RD : Pete and I get to the show just around 7pm. We see a limo parked outside the hall in the quik chek parking lot and start making guesses as who was in it. I wet with the shane bros because the limo was the only think that could house their thighs. Pre show we see Jacey and BS with him for a bit. Jacey immediately ditches us losers as soon as he sees April Hunter.

PP: It was interesting watching Jacey mark out for some of the video clips at the Modtrom table like (I think) Insane Dragon’s springboard Asai moonsault from one of the Hackettstown shows. Before the show starts they celebrate someone’s birthday and we get the bizarro visual of Dana (I think that’s her name… the JAP photographer that isn’t Mary–Kate) bringing slices of birthday cake back to the boys in the locker room with a fork stuck in each slice. I flashback to the Family Guy “Little Rascals” episode and picture the JAPW workers as small children with big eyes and cute l’il eyelashes.

THE SHOW:
RD : they actually got a projector screen now for the JAPW tron, which is an upgrade from the white paper on the last show. Its smaller than your average school screen, but it adds the great effect of being spin back up like a window shade when your done with it. They have a bunch of interview stuff ala the old ecw pulp fiction type things. Included in this was deranged and insane dragon doing an imperson of the hit squad with deranged claiming that they (the hit squad) were the whitest puerto ricans ever.

PP: One of the reasons I love Modtrom is because they’re not afraid to get really wacky with their musical choices as there was this ridiculously perky instrumental theme playing throughout the Pulp Fiction piece. The “whitest Puerto Ricans” line was hysterical and got a big-ass sitcom laugh from the fans in attendance. All in all, Modtrom really smokes RF from a production standpoint and I recommend you wait for their edition of the Haas show to come out.

Match 1 : TONY LAZARO vs. EXPLOSIVE EDDIE THOMAS
RD : This was a rookies debut on a regular show. This was pretty ok, not as good as the lethal/rainchild debut. Both guys looked presentable, though there were some bad punches from thoma, but I'll cut him slack. Lazaro continues the bizarro trend of people using "bitter sweet symphony" as theme music. Lazaro wins with a stretch powerbomb. Post match, the new Shaolin Wrecking Crew (magic and suba) beat up both the rookies. They sandwich avalanche them and later they stack them and suba gives them 2 or 3 vader bombs.

PP: Lazaro works heel and is pretty funny doing the Lothario gimmick of moseying around ringside during his entrance blowing kisses to THE LADIIEEEEEES, especially when you consider that he looks all of 15. The post-match beatdown was hilarious just to see all of the other students celebrating like they just hit the lottery as the SWC put Thomas and Lazaro through the wringer. This was OK for their A-show debut (I can’t say they’ve never worked in front of a crowd before as there had to be about 150 people at the student show I went to last month).

MATCH 2 : SEIJIN AKKI vs. EXPLOITED CHILD ELAX
RD: Akki comes out to the Mutoh BATT theme and doing poses. This was an ok match, they really didn't blow anything. Akki got most of the offense and did a bunch of mat work. They both did a fake dive to the floor, akki delfin style, elax tiger mask style. They both did dives, akki ended up going over with a diving brain kick.

PP: Akki’s match was much better than the match at the Haas show match last month since this time it wasn’t bogged down with the mishigas from Judas Young and Sheik Ramirez constantly interfering. Of course, someone should’ve told him that faking a dive in Bayonne would get him nothing but suck heat. He plays to us throughout the match and we dork out accordingly.

MATCH 3 : SCOOT ANDREWS vs. SLYK WAGNER BROWN w/ APRIL HUNTER
RD : This was an ok match, but got sloppy towards the end with them having to do Slyk's full nelson slam twice when scoot didn't get lifted on the first time. This match also featured the dangerous snap mare '02 when brown snap mared scoot and it looked like andrews took it right on top of his head. I'm sure if this was '98 or '99 kobashi and misawa would be using this to needlessly compress each other’s spines. Scoot won with the Force of Nature.

PP: I predict that the Burning Snapmare will be a finisher in AJPW within the next five years. Just as the match ends, someone claiming to be Seijin Akki shows up and sits with us for the rest of the night, but that can’t be right… this was some white boy, not the Japanese superstar from Osaka. You can’t work us THAT easily, pal.

MATCH 4 : THE SHANE BROTHERS w/ RON NEIMI vs. THE SOLUTION (Papadon & Havok)
RD : The Solution come out as shiny happy babyfaces. Neimi comes out and cuts a promo on Fat Frank and the Hit Squad. Playing off the new heat between Frank and Donnie B, Neimi says the real reason they're feuding is because they were really a couple and Donnie got upset because Frank would go down to the sperm bank, but would be making withdrawls. Ron warns the Solution that the Shane's aren't going to sell for them. Of course, the Solution start with some punches which the Shane's sell... This is pretty much a squash, with the Shane's hitting both of the Solution with a TKO at the same time.

PP: Niemi is really good on THE STICK in a smart mark kind of way, sort of like Jeff G. Bailey without the histrionics. The Solution are a fine mid-grade indy scum team here in the Northeast but they got no chance coming out against these monsters.

MATCH 5 : CHRIS CABBANA vs. THE BUG
RD : In between the matches, the announcer gets the "What?" treatment from the crowd to which he counters with the "homosezwhat?" which results in the crowd continuing to say what until Chris Cabbana says he'll take anyone on from the back, but not a man. So, the Bug runs out and he almost drops Cabbana on his head a bunch. There were several times we were sure Cabbana was a dead man, and this was a 5 minute match at most. The Bug wins with an Emerald Frozen type move. I think part of the problem with this is nobody knew who the hell the Bug was until they announced him post match.

PP: The Akki imposter rips on the Bug non-stop, specifically mentioning an eight-man tag match where he apparently forgot everyone’s spots “including his own.” HA! We spend most of the match fearing for Cabbana’s life, as the Bug seems more concerned with his moves than with the welfare of his opponent.

MATCH 6 : LOW KI vs. KID KRUEL w/ ALLISON DANGER
RD : This was match of the night. A lot of mat work and stiff as a motherfucker. Ki hit Kruel with one of the loudest chops I have ever heard. This was better than their Haas Memorial match as I think they had more time to work. This was a lot of Kruel getting kicked really really hard. Allison interfered a couple times but I think her presence was really lacking. She was there for a few of interference spots, but other than yelling "shut up" at some people, she was just sort of out there. There was an evil spot when Danger was holding Ki on the floor when Kruel went for a pescado, Ki breaks free and just punts Kruel in the ribs on the way down. Ki ended up getting the win with dragon clutch.

PP: JAP-JAP! This was just awesome live with heaping spoonfuls of matworky goodness. At one point there’s this 2-3 minute period where Kruel just latches onto Ki’s arm to work for the jujigatame and they work a bunch of moves in and out of the clinch with Kruel never letting go of the arm. Unreal. Kruel also slaps on the greatest-looking cravat Ray and I have ever seen. The aforementioned chop was one of those moments where something is so ridiculously stiff that people literally fall out of their chairs, and it just sounds Satanic in that tiny building. Like if Tenryu was practicing chops in his basement rumpus room. This was an easy match of the night and was the main reason we were so hot to see Kruel keep up the continuity by going after Ki the following night at the Super 8 Summit.

MATCH 7 : THE BOOGIE KNIGHTS (DANNY DRAKE & MIKE TOBIN) vs. WASTED YOUTH (DERANGED & INSANE DRAGON)
RD : This match was pretty entertaining as Deranged and Dragon were pretty subdued and didn't do any of the really stupid garbage spots that have really dragged down the matches the two have had with each other. At one point, a bunch of people were singing the Boogie Knight's theme (You're the Best from the Karate Kid) which was funny. Dragon and Deranged did some nice looking kicks during this and the Knights did a lot of selling, which I think it there biggest problem. I can only really think of a couple of offensive spots that they did and the only one's I'm really remembering from this is their wheelbarrow powerbomb partner onto the opponent and a bat shot at the end. Oh, and a vertical suplex by one of the Knights where Deranged was tapping his feet on the ceiling like he was in a Lionel Richie video. Post match, the Hit Squad run in and run off the Boogie Knights who run off with the JAPW tag titles through the back door. Wasted Youth are left in the ring with the Hit Squad and make the mistake of getting in their face and take two dangerous suplexes. The crowd calls for the wall shot, which the Hit Squad tease, but drop it and say they'll do the wall spot when they feel like it, so they're still sort of heels.

PP: I don’t know where people get the impression that the BKs are green, as they did a great job of reeling Wasted Youth in and not letting them do anything more stupid than a couple of dives. Granted they don’t have the most spectacular offense in the business, but their selling and bumping more than compensates for that shortcoming. Wasted Youth are charismatic as hell and really click with the fans, particularly the younger set (speaking of which, there were more kids at this show than at any JAPW show I can ever remember). They could be a team to watch if/when they mature some and slow things down.

MATCH 8 : CROWBAR w/ SERENA vs. STRYKER
RD : Crowbar and Serena suck face a few times during the match, including Crowbar purposely doing a slide out to the floor to do so. I had a long weekend of wrestling and I'm writing this on Tuesday. The match wasn't spectacular, nor was it bad enough for me to really remember much about it. I remember Crowbar winning. I don't remember how.

PP: This was… there. Stryker’s shtick tends to work better when he’s working tag matches, and there’s always a few people at the JAPW shows constantly yelling at him to “SMILE!” while he’s trying to work his match.

MATCH 9 : DIXIE w/ VALENTINA vs. HOMICIDE for the JAPW Triple Crown
RD : This was pretty good, but not off the charts, mostly due to the finish. Where as Danger was only sort of there for specific interference spots, Valentina seemed to have better presence during the match with regard to match. Small things like pushing the ropes to your man when he's trying to rope break is something that makes it seem like you're paying more attention to the match than just standing out there. This was pretty back and forth with Dixie hitting a springboard double stomp on Homicide at one point. Dixie sort of hit his Dixie Driver finish, though it was more like a straight Air Raid Crash as it seemed like Homicide missed Dixie's knee on the way down. The finish was Homicide hitting the Cop Killer on Dixie, but the ref had been bumped. Scoot Andrews runs in and gives Homicide the Force of Nature and throws Dixie on top for the pin. Post match he explains that 1) that was a message from American Dragon for Homicide (so I guess there's an indy scum superstar alliance) and that 2) Scoot wanted to keep the title on Dixie for their upcoming match in Florida.

PP: Dixie brings the industrial metal as he comes out to Fear Factory’s “Body Hammer.” This wasn’t quite as good as their previous singles match at the December show but was still very good, with Dixie getting lots of offense in when Homicide wasn’t literally beating his chest bloody. The ref bump was great with Homicide ducking and Dixie accidentally taking out the ref with a forearm, and Dixie sells the anguish of the screw-up perfectly. Homicide takes over and plants Dixie with the Cop Killer but the ref is still out, which allows Scoot to hit the ring and absolutely nuke Homicide with the Force of Nature. I like the idea of a Scoot/AD alliance, but it makes zero sense now that the main event for the next show is a Ki/Homicide/AD three-way. They’d be better off adding Scoot and making it a straight tag match with Ki/Homicide vs. Scoot/AD.

MATCH 10 : DA HIT SQUAD (MONSTA MACK & MAFIA) w/ JOHNNY D. vs. JAY LETHAL/RAINCHILD FOR THE JAPW TAG TEAM TITLES :
RD : This was pretty much a glorified squash/"education" match with the Squad playing the monsters and Jay and Rain playing the plucky youngsters who fight back, but you know in the end are going to get killed. And boy do they get killed. Of the two rookies, I think Lethal looked the better overall. They did a spot where Lethal I think Monsta with a drop toe hold after ducking some clotheslines and did 10 quick run off the ropes leg drops to the back of his head for one near fall. Mafia did a spot with Rainchild where he would do the corner punches, get shoved off and then hop back up, though the punches were sort of rookie throwing punches. Rainchild took the ceiling bump and it looked like he took out part of the lighting fixtures, which fortunately had the bulbs out of them. Rainchild also did a spot where he dived onto one of the Hit Squad on the floor and then got in the ring and dived the other. Unfortunately, he landed with the back of his legs on the railing both times he did it, which had to suck. Towards the end, Rainchild eats the running powerbomb into the wall and Lethal takes the press slam throw into the wall. They set up the finish which is a big metal store front sign with a message about "Jersey Shore, here we come" as well as PCW crossed out and another group name and Lethal takes the burning hammer onto the sign as it's hung across two chairs. Post match, they powerbomb Lethal on top of Rainchild from the apron and through the table. The post match angle builds with the Boogie Knights coming back to the building with the tag titles and distracting the Hit Squad who get jumped by Suba and Magic... who then get joined by the Solution who get in on the action... then Wasted Youth... until finally the Shanes run those guys off to get a piece of the Hit Squad. While the Shanes and DHS fight, Johnny D gets beat up by the Wrecking Crew and by Wasted Youth. The finish is still sort of weird as these multi-person beat down on the Squad is sort of babyfacing them, but by the same means, it's also sort of pay back for them basically bullying and laying wasted to just about everyone in the fed, so it's sort of a gray area. Overall, it sort of builds to future matches down the line between the Hit Squad and Shanes.

PP: I can’t believe Ray forgot about Jay Lethal’s family! Jay’s dad has been videotaping all of Jay’s matches that I can remember, and I guess since it was the lad’s first main event, the rest of his family was there in force as well. Apparently Jay never clued in his sister (Moesha Lethal) to the true nature of America’s Favorite Sport (tm Memphis) as she was marking out like a howler monkey for all of the abuse he took… and with the match clocking in at just over 17 minutes, this was a whole lot of marking out. After awhile I finally stopped watching the match and just sat and watched the poor girl seeing her bro’s life flash before her eyes as DHS took their sweet time dismantling Jay and Rainchild. The match is basically one loooooong build to the inevitable wall bump, and DHS do a great job of stringing the tease out as long as they can before finally delivering on the spot. The post-match schmozz lasted nine days but they had a ton of good heat for it so it must’ve worked.

RD : Overall, this was a good show. I'm a bit disappointed that they've decided to change American Dragon v. Homicide to a 3 way now with Low Ki as I'd like to see them do just a straight match or even change it to a tag match than a 3 way. Either way, I'll probably be there next month.

PP: This was fun… and perhaps more importantly, this was quite possibly the most innocuous show JAP has ever put on other than the Haas and Red Cross shows. No Skinhead Ivan, no Sheik, no CSC, no Rebel (Frank had threatened us with his return at the last show), and nothing more distasteful than Frank tossing out a couple of F-bombs during his opening promo. I dug this a bunch. Hopefully our group will be larger for the April 5 show with the aforementioned three-way.