A new policy: if anyone says anything at all disparaging about this report, it
will be considered as tantamount to taking food out of my kitten's mouth. I am
in constant contact with the State Attorney's Office, as well as with a trained
team of assassins who are nothing if not covert, and shan't brook any
disparagement. Thanks!

What Worked:

Lizmark and Silver King get about five minutes and we get a bunch of fluid
aerial stuff from both men (including Silver King cross bodyblockin' out of the
ring) and some kicks that were stiffer than Curt Hennig from the King, who is
my official underused luchador of the week. And he goes over! Bang!

DC and the Armstrongs go at it for the Worldwide tag straps! The Armstrongs as
faces work like nothing so much as the Fantastics, with some utterly graceful
doubleteaming. If there were still territories, you could pencil them in as
Continental Tag Champs (especially if the Bullet were booking). Of course,
there aren't still territories, so the best worker in the world isn't the
traveling world champ letting Pez Whatley wrestle him for 60 minutes and tag
wrestling is dead. But the Armstrongs still rule, and this was every bit as
good at their previous tag series with Raven and Kanyon. DC goes over for the
belts, though. And they get a DC Sucks chant!

Aw, mother of fuck. Bull Payne. Bobby Duncum. Aerial stuff that didn't blow
from Duncum. Good pacing. Stiff enough kicks. I don't want to see it again or
anything, but it was up here this time.

Scott Stud and Prince TahitianTreat have a solid if unspectacular match. A
buncha methodical offense, about what you'd expect.

The best thing that ever happened to Rey Mysterio was getting to know and love
his lovable booker. The second best thing was getting to wrestle Ric Flair with
Flair playing heel. Fuck the rating this got. Unlike Bigelow, Nash, or Norton,
Flair came off as a heavyweight that Rey could beat, just because Flair
bothered to make his offense look credible even though he had seven inches and
96 pounds (maybe 60 legit) on Rey. Flair bumped like all heck for Thuggish
Ruggish Rey, and I really dug the pacing and the psychology here, and was
completely able to suspend disbelief.

Lash and Lenny's match was awkward in patches, but had nice spots and a
surprisingly versatile offense from Lane.

What Didn't Work:

Scott Norton no-sold. Chip Minton did a lot of dropkicks. This was really lame
and lacked drama, as does any Scott Norton match. How the hell did NJ get the
belt off this pustra?

Barry Darsow and Jerry Flynn go all Coliseum Video Fan Request match with
typical heaps of Darsow (as the crowdpleasing Thunderfoot rips Darsow's shirt
off and then calls out Meng for a future match).

Oh no! Mike Enos got Meng all over his Lodi pants! He'll never get that out!

Chris "I've Always Wanted to live in Connecticut" Jericho and Saturn worked
well enough together, but the non-finish was depressingly predictable and
advanced the storyline not at all.

Tony Gancarski.
Lucky lisp was not wasted on you!