RAW Workrate Report 1/26/03
What Worked
PAS: Damn was that handicap match amazingly great. It was something I had no desire to see, but was a ton of fun. I am digging the new WWE style and there was some really choice work over RVD’s arm, especially by Flair who busted out a bunch of nifty stuff he never does. I especially liked the hammerlock/knee drop combo, and the armbar with the twisting and pushing of the wrist. RVD looked surprisingly okay as he actually sold the arm sort of.
TKG: That was weird as all fuck. The MONSTER BATISTA with the hammerlock. I mean RVD has some over spots you use him as a hot tag guy, you don’t make him work the bulk of the match. But fuck it worked. His normally shitty kicks and punches looked good, and he isn’t Hiro Saito but the senton looked nice. He actually didn’t forget to sell the arm. I also like the new WWE style.
PAS: If they are trying to educate the fans that big moves mean something, having Jericho sell that Powerbomb for 10 minutes is a really good way. I am totally shocked that I don’t have anything to shit on here.
PAS: Joshi tag was pretty fun even though Lita was so wasted that she could barely walk down to the ring. I especially liked all the work on Victoria’s hurt chin, including all the Finlaytastic cravate variations.
TKG: Damn Lita was either stoned or drunk. Full on dilated pupils. It looked like she might be hanging out backstage with Austin or something. It might not be a bad idea for him to start going after younger tang. They put up with more so you don’t have to hit them as hard or something. But match was good with Victoria as a fine poor man’s Tully to Lita’s poor man’s Gino. I also liked all of Lita’s offense as I dig the stripper-pole-currana and her STO’S. As Ross talks about her judo background…I kind of want to see her and Ogawa vs. Fujiwara and Thundercracky. Stevie really does need to take her aside and tell her about his friend Mikey.
PAS: After watching Andy Dick do some nice Brazillian Ju-Jitsoish guard work on Tom Green’s fat sidekick I think he and Lita could have the best crack head Bumfights Vale Tudo match ever.
PAS: Mark Henry and Goldberg are my two favorite guys on this show, so I am all for them working together. Some nice stiff stuff although not nearly enough. How much Whitefish did Goldberg eat before the match to be that fleghmy.
TKG: I think he has to spit two times everytime he passes a HBK shirt. Short armed clothesline was nice. This match should have been longer or Henry realy needs to realize that the two should be allied and not fighting. He has to realize that to be successful Black talent you need to dump your black manager and work with the Jew. I really thought they were going to set that up as Henry had a great look of disgust as he had to protect the lightskinned brother. “Ok OJ so now that your in trouble, now your black. Yeah sure Thomas, now its an electronic lynching, it didn’t bother you when you and your Catholic school buddies burned the Cross outside the AME church…But now you expect me to defend you, you fucking sell out. Well Ok I’ll do it, but I’m not happy about it.”
PAS: As long as Mick Foley isn’t doing his warm hearted motivational speeches he is still pretty great on the mike. I especially dug him busting his own eye open. I would be into a Flair v. Foley RAW match with lots of blood.
TKG: Orton really had the great look of “bad ass” frat guy who made fun of homeless guy’s missing eye. Suddenly homeless guy turns out to be crazy and tells him “For a dollar I’ll let you touch the socket”. Orton looks lost at what to do. Funny Foley doesn’t appeal to me. For a wealthy man, crazy homeless Foley has all this pent up class hatred and shit. Worked.
What Didn’t Work
PAS: Jericho’s Howard Dean thing was kind of funny, but Jesus did Ross and Lawler step all over his joke. Look dimwits let the guy tell the joke, he doesn’t need exposition from you two.
TKG: Maven really seems to be tailor made for the role of Trish’s emasculated friend. You know the guy who’s shoulder she cries to…”ooh my boyfriend’s so mean..why can’t I ever meat a nice guy. Why do they always hurt me”. Maven should be doing the friend schtick.
PAS: Why the hell did Trish and Jericho spend that entire segment playing with their hair. It was like watching Nash flirt with Nash.
TKG: Aw fuck I don’t want Benoit on this show. Wow that segment with Benoit managed to bury everyone.
PAS: Buries Beniot because he looks secondary to Micheals, Buries Lesner because Beniot doesn’t want his useless belt. Makes Beniot v. HHH secondary to the HHH v. Micheals rematch that really means something.
TKG: Yeah it really makes Benoit look like King Cobra challenging for Lawlers belt between Jimmy Valiant challenges. Yeah Valiant rightfully should get the next shot but the rules mean we have to kill time with King Cobra for a month. Helmsley vs. HBK really is a shitty version of not very skilled but can brawl well vs. really does a tremendous job is a brawler, much to my dismay.
PAS: To be fair Beniot is the worlds greatest King Cobra.
TKG: Bubba vs. Kane stank and Conway tried but that Rico match was ungood.
PAS: I was amused at the new WWE style in Rico v. Conway as they did a chinlock spot in a three minute match that was only on the show to set up Bernie Kosar flashing her Silicone Valley